Scheiße, Be Mine.

I’m just so fucking tired of diving into things I can’t swim out of. I’m tired of “realizing” that things were meant to be. That it’s perfect. Only to find out it isn’t. I was so sure of it, too. I’m tired of people giving up on me. Playing with me. Toying with me. I’m tired of people in general. Relationships have truly become trial and error. What don’t I understand? Why the fuck am I so stupid? It’s this simple. If you can’t handle the error, don’t go for the trial. So why the fuck do I try anyway, despite telling myself how strong I am. I guess it’s really how strong I think I am. Because if I were that strong, it wouldn’t be cutting me so deep. Wounds heal, scars don’t. If I can’t handle the hits, I shouldn’t pick the fight. If I can’t fight on, give in. I don’t want to live this kind of life anymore. I really don’t. I don’t want anybody’s sympathy. I’d much rather have their understanding. I’m sorry.